The Postman
This joke was posted 03/20/01
A postman for 35 years is about to retire. On his last day
of
delivering mail on his route, at the first house on the block, the
residents greet him with some warm muffins. The next home he goes to, the couple
greets him with some hot coffee and donuts. The next house, the couple greets
him with some new fishing lures and new fishing rod. The next house, the
bachelor hands him season passes to baseball games. This trend continued all along his
route.
When he reached the end of the block, the lady answered the door in a very
revealing nightey. She led him in the house, and upstairs to a candle-lit
bedroom full of flowers. She seductively undressed the post man, laid him
on the bed and proceeded to give him the best sex he ever had.
Afterwards, she put a bath robe on him, led him downstairs to the kitchen
and cooked him a breakfast fit for a king: eggs, pancakes with blueberries,
bacon, sausage, crepes, bagels with cream cheese, hash browned potatoes,
orange juice, and coffee. The post man was astounded by such gratitude. He
noticed a dollar bill stuck to the bottom of the coffee cup. In his wonder
he spoke up; "I must say, this has to be the most wonderful retirement
present anyone could receive, but I don't understand about the dollar bill."
She replied, "Well, my husband and I were talking last night about your
last day and retiring, and I asked my husband what we could give you.
My husband's reply was "fuck him, give him a dollar." "Cooking you
breakfast was my idea." she added.