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South Vs
North
Southerner is having his breakfast (coffee, grits,
biscuits, and jam) when a Northerner chewing obnoxiously on gum
sits down next to him.
The Southerner ignores the Northerner who, nevertheless, starts
a conversation.
Northerner: "When you Southern people eat bread, do you eat
the whole slice?"
Southerner: "Yep."
Northerner: (after blowing a huge bubble) "We don't. Up
North, we only eat what's inside. The crusts we collect in a
container, recycle it, then transform them into biscuits and
send them to the South."
The Northerner has a smirk on his face. The Southerner listens
in silence.
The Northerner persists: "Do you eat jam with
biscuits?"
Southerner: "Yep."
Northerner: (cracking and smacking his gum between his teeth and
chuckling). "We don't. Up North after we eat fruit for breakfast, we
put all the peels,seeds, and leftovers in containers, recycle them, transform them
into jam, and then send it down South.
Then the Southerner asks: "Y'all have sex up North?"
Northerner: "Why of course we do", the Northerner
says, as he pops another big bubble.
Southerner: "And what do y'all do with the condoms once ya
use 'em?"
Northerner: "We throw them away, of course.
Southerner: We don't. Down South we put 'em in a jar, recycle 'em,
melt'em down into chewing gum and sell 'em to you
Northerners."
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